Truffle Loving
by Imaginosity
Summary: An insight to the growth of the Truffle Loving within Haeven's police force.
1. Foaly, Root and Trouble

**A/n: **Random stuffs about the ever growing truffle-loving cult-dom after Opal introduced them too Foaly and Root.

**Foaly**

**8:30pm **Am eating carrot as I wind down after a terrible day! Was shouted at by Root, but got him back with comments about his flubs. Otherwise office was okay, but at lunch-break all went wrong...

Ran out of truffles. Walked in to Charlie's Chocolates and asked the man for truffles. Told me they were out of stock! What cheek: he knows for a fact that I had to specifically asked him to bring shipments down from the land o' mud! Who has dared to plunder my stock?

To top this off, someone has stolen my foil hat. Am most outraged. Suspect Julius.

**8:54pm **Have just realized master key is missing.

**9pm **Still fuming over hat.

**Julius**

**7:06am **Ruddy awful start to day: Ran out of cigars.

**9:01am **Also, am suffering withdrawal symptoms with no Holly to yell at. Had to do with yelling at Foaly, but received harsh comments about my weight. Stupid Centaur. Shall steal his foil hat.

**1:02pm **Stole foil hate whilst unsuspecting git was on lunch break.

Crisis, however: I am sure I saw Charlie's Chocolates box on Foaly's desk just as I slipped into his cubicle (have also stolen stupid donkey's master key). Am suspicious as the heavenly scent of truffles also wafted around the room. Donkey better not be plundering supply that I keep at Charlie's.

**3:52pm **Visited Charlie's. No chocolate truffles in stock! I am sure it is that idiot centaur. Will get him back.

**Trouble**

**9am **Am concerned for Root's health: did not shout at me once and I have already been here an hour.

**9:04am **Root has been yelling at Foaly. Slightly less concerned.

**12pm** Am feeling peckish.

**7pm** Eating truffles. Went to Charlie's Chocolates at lunch-break and saw brand new treat, truffles. Have bought fourteen packs. According to man at counter they are specially ordered by two anonymous customers every week.

Can very easily see how fourteen packs can be consumed in that time: truffles are delicious.


	2. Frond

**A/n:** Behold, I am back with a new chapter for my random little story. I have realized there is a loophole in my plot: how is it that Julius is still alive? Well, my dickens: you will have to use a little imagination there.

Thank you first (and only) reviewer **Dim Aldebaran** (crowd cheers)! Glad you find it funny! It will probably get longer as more fairies become addicted to truffles chocolaty goodness.

**Foaly**

**9:20am **Have ordered more Truffles. Have reserved them.

**10:30am** Woke up in a terrible mood. Brain was hurting due to lack of foil hat. Made new one, so am feeling slightly better.

When I got into the office I found the master keys on my desk. Attached to it was a note that read 'ha-ha'. Now know it was Julius as it smelt strongly of fungus cigar smoke. Has caused my room to smell that way too. Ew. Am planning payback as I write.

**10:45pm** Took walk to gather some items for payback (and to ditch the fungusy smell), when I saw Trouble eating. At first I thought the small brown spheres were swear toad droppings. Dismissed it as the Holly withdrawal everyone seems to be suffering (I swear I saw Chix ignore Frond the other day). Have been thinking and have realized those small brown spheres that looked like swear toad droppings could have been my missing truffles! Dropped toolbox on hoof when I found this out.

For the mean time payback is put on hold. Trouble must pay.

**11:26am** Foil hat was stolen as I did my hair! Made announcement over the intercom. Distressed by lack of response (the snorts of laughter from outside the Ops booth don't count as 'response').

**3:22pm** Spent four hours looking for damn hat and found it in Julius's office, crumpled into a ball (was pretending to deliver doughnuts)! A basketball hoop was hanging on the back of his door. However, payback is still on hold, as now I must pursue the subject of truffle-stealing with Trouble.

**8pm** Spent the rest of the day looking for Trouble in order to corner him over truffles. Was nowhere to be found! Demanded information of Julius. Apparently Trouble has taken a shuttle to Switzerland, acting on a tip-off. Still suspicious.

**11:13pm **They make truffles in Switzerland! It is a sign!

**Julius**

**9:45am** I have new cigars. Foaly has a new foil hat. Carrot-brained 'genius' is tempting me. It will his own fault that it accidentally gets crumpled when he takes it off to do his hair (I know all his secrets). He should respect me! I returned his precious master key. Left note of course.

**11:24am **Due to Holly withdrawal, I had to shout at Frond for being even stupider then normal. Was very hard as she kept doing the 'pathetic female who has the lawyers' routine. Gave up after five minutes and am searching for another poor soul to terrorize. This, of course, occurred after I stole that idiotic centaur's foil hat.

**11:27pm **Announcement over intercom that we should be searching for a missing foil hat! Must talk to Foaly about the appropriate use of equipment (though it did give the office a chuckle).

**12am** Approached by Trouble for permission to take a shuttle to Switzerland with a tip-off. Goblins smuggling pizzas. Bad for the economy. Seeing as there isn't much to do around the office/in the field these days, I let him go after a few rants. Feeling better.

**1:06pm** Wanted a boost so I rang up Charlie's Chocolates and demanded truffles. Ha ha: guy on the phone sounded like he was wetting himself. Serves him right for denying me my truffles! Anyway, the shout did me good.

Decided to attach a basketball hoop to the back of the door and use Foaly's screwed up tinfoil hat as a ball. Was having muchas fun till Frond came in and interrupted me mid slam-dunk. Shouted at her, of course. Felt bad when she almost broke down so I gave her an hour of to 'think this over before returning to endanger others.' Just realized I shouted at her for nearly half an hour.

**3:18pm** Bored! Am going for coffee.

**4:00pm** Shouted at coffee man, came back and found my 'basketball' was missing.

**5:02pm** Still bored. Stupid mud-man TV is showing Friends again. Stupid laughter is driving me insane.

**5:05pm** Foaly came in. Imbecile looked like an idiot with his tinfoil hat crumpled and battered on his head. Must do this more often. He came in asking for Trouble. Told him about Trouble's trip. Moronic donkey departed muttering about truffles.

**5:08pm** D'ARVIT: TRUFFLES! THAT IDIOT CENTAUR HAS STOLEN MY TRUFFLES!

**5:15pm** Git has locked himself in Ops booth tinkering with one of his stupid toys. His hat is doomed.

**11:45pm** Master plan to be put into action after I have a few volunteers. But for the mean time I best get some sleep: lots of shouting to do tomorrow.

**Trouble**

**9am **Am on a mission to discover more about these wonderfully heavenly goodies. Have already finished nine boxes.

**9:59am** Had to concentrate very hard when Root started yelling at someone. That fairy has some serious lungs!

**11pm** After consuming two more boxes of chocolaty goodness, I hit jackpot: Apparently Switzerland makes brilliant chocolates and there are vague rumors (according to freesites4fairies.gom/omgiluvgoblns4eva) that there are goblins smuggling pizza's into Haven (unlikely). Shall go ask Root.

**9pm** Mission was a success! 18 more boxes of chocolaty goodness in exchange for a bit of gold and a diamond I confiscated of a gnome on the way. Truffles are the root of all evil. But evil is delicious.

**9:08pm **Never found any sign of goblins.

**Frond**

**11am **I'm at work and Foaly is being, like, weird! He is sooo pathetic, sneaking around like that. I'm following him to see what he's up too. There's no good gossip these days.

**11:20am **OMG! I was, like, totally, like just minding my own business when Root, like, YELLED at me. He is sooo annoying! I gave him my Power Look and he backed down. Sheesh: I get no respect…except from Chix.

**1:10pm **Was going to Julius's office to tell him…I can't remember but it was, like, really important. Have been doing loads of hard work so was expecting praise, but was shouted at again! Was given afternoon off though. Can't remember why though.

**2:15pm **Just came back from hour off. Bought two boxes of nice chocolates. Very yummy. Man said they were reserved, but gave him my Power Look.

**3pm **Still working hard. Have finished one box. Very yummy. Snuck out of office and bought two more boxes. Still four left on shelf.

**4pm **Bought other four.

**8:17pm **Have consumed three boxes of chocolates. Box says 'truffles' on it.

**9pm** Going partying.


End file.
